Month 3 with a 4 year old ...

I need to make a request for everyone to lift us up in regards to helping our 4 year old adjust. The first 2 months, was a breeze for our youngest ... now the winds have changed.

We are really dealing with some difficulties here lately, and we think it's tied to the realization that we are 'living' here. It's just not possible to explain this concept to a child this age before we come, although we certainly tried. Now that we are here and the questions have come such as, "When are we going back to (home)?" "I miss Grandma and Grandpa", "I wish Zane (a cousin) was here" A LOT more frequently we are realizing that we are entering into the stage for this precious child of adjustment to being here ... and not leaving.

This is completely normal, but we need to have discernment and wisdom on how to handle this. It doesn't help any that this child is already prone to the dramatic and emotional side anyway!

We believe that security is promoted when we hold the line and continue to expect obedience and helpfulness and the things that we would expect living at 'home'. BUT I wonder, when we can clearly see that this child is going through a difficult time if we don't relax it a little and shore up the loose ends later???? Or do we hold the rope tighter knowing that if we don't it will just continue for even longer??? We don't know, that's something to lift up for us specifically, guidance in this area. It almost seems like a situational decision for us at times ... but that is exhausting and we are exhausted with it already.

Unfortunately, another reason why we know that our youngest is going through some kind of adjustment is because of the behavior (or lack thereof) that is chosen DAILY. Yes, at 4 years old limits are pushed and obedience isn't always achieved, but not with EVERYTHING. Literally, right now, if we are not doing what this child wants it is complete mayhem and an emotional breakdown. I wish I was exaggerating, but I am not at all.

We have stepped up the amount of one on one time to promote an extra sense of security, we have stepped up our personal times of lifting up this child as a family and privately and we have continued to keep our child accountable and impose discipline as necessary, hoping that the firmness isn't just making things worse.

So just a simple request to join us in getting through this time. It doesn't really help that all of this is coming at Christmas time either. We are all dealing with this in our own way and don't have the 'reserves' to handle a lot of extra emotional things ... but we will because He knows this is happening and He will help us.

I think my main request has been to just simply reveal things to us that are unknown right now so that we can work through them and give us the patience and understanding to do so.

I appreciate so much being able to type this and know that there are people taking time out of their day to help us wage this war and win by lifting us up continually. It's making me cry right now just thinking about it ... we need that strength in this situation and it encourages us to know that He will generously give it to us because of the loving requests of so many that support us.

This too shall pass ....